blarg

I hate being in this house all damn day. I don't know what is worse, when Im here by myself all day with no one to talk to, or when my parents and/or brother are here and they all ignore me. No one talks to me. I can be here all day with them and no one will say a damn word. Adam was supposed to work today, but he got someone to pick up his shift, like he has been a LOT lately. I mean, its none of my concern really, and he still drives me to work always, but... he DOES owe me some money, and he's always complaining that he doesnt have money. Its only a little money, but its the principle. The worst thing about today was that he was supposed to call me when he got off work, and he didnt know it, but I was going to convince him to come over here. I needed it. I HATE being in this god damned house all fucking day. But, he didnt go to work. He did not tell me this. I figured he would be home by midnight at the latest, so at 1 I called his house. No answer. I called a few more times, no answer. Finally at about 3:30 am he called and told me he didnt even GO to work. He has to work a double tomorrow. (if he even fucking goes) which means he will be first cut on the night shift. He wanted to know if I wanted to hang out. I told him I didnt know, because Im supposed to go to Drews birthday thingie, but Im not sure if it is saturday or sunday. I have to wait to find out from Mark.

That 3:30 am phone call took place right as I was signing on to do a mushy entry about how much I want to live with Adam. I know Im making too big a deal out of it, but whenever something like this happens I always question things.. Like... He isnt really as into this, doesnt really want to live together, etc, because he doesnt do the constant update sort of thing. Like he doesnt call me and TELL me that he isnt working that day, even IF we dont have definate plans, I would kinda like to know. Just because Im insecure and clingy and at a very very vulnerable part of this relationship, because we ARE seriously discussing moving in together...Thats a different entry though, Ill save it.

God I sound like a psycho girlfriend dont I.

:|cause|:|effect|: