whatever

More adventures in Internetland...

daringc69: hello

Me: hello

daringc69: what r u lookin for?

Me: what do you mean?

daringc69: are you bi?

Me: no

daringc69: ever thought of being with a female or couple?

Me: thought about it, sure. don't want to though

daringc69: why not?

Me: doesnt appeal to me

daringc69: you might like it, if you try it

Me: i think i can decide for myself what i like and what i don't

daringc69: thats cool if you don't want to experience life,,,,i guess it would be yur loss

Me: you have no idea what i have experienced in life, and what i havent. just because I don't want to do what you think I ought to want to do doesnt mean that i losing out on something

daringc69: you are missing out...if you are not willing to try things...not trying to upset you...just being honest

Me: what you are being is not called honesty. its called judgmental

daringc69: you are wrong...i am stating facts...if you don't try things in life then you will miss out

Me: i am not going to miss out on my life simply because there is one thing that I don't want to try

daringc69: sure

Me: what the hell is that supposed to mean?

daringc69: nothing...forget it...sorry to bother you

Me: a word of advice... you will do a lot better to find what YOU are looking for in life if you open your mind a little. it is you who misses out when you judge people the way you do

daringc69: look...i don't know who and the hell you think you are trying to preach to but i don't need to hear that from you. i am in no way judgmental and i am sorry if you can't handle the facts. and for you to get so defensive then i would have to think that you know that i am right

Me: I don't think I am the defensive one here

daringc69: your right

Me: of course i am

daringc69: sure...kid

Me: I am 21, according to your profile you are 25. unfortunately I've got quite a bit of knowledge on you. maybe some day you will see that

daringc69: you are so full of shit

Me: Oh, such brilliant words. you are so wise

daringc69: you are not open minded at all and you will lose out

Me: i am going to click the little ignore button now, goodbye

***************

I am so fucking bored. I really don't feel like writing this entry but, I mean, what the fuck am I going to do if I don't?

Went to Mark's dance performance last night. Terrible. Not him, the whole thing. There was no way he could have saved it. Boring.

We were supposed to go to Fantasy/Fetish night at the club we sometimes go to. Long story, but we didn't end up going. We were both dressed for it. I was wearing the classic Catholic school girl uniform. I was supposed to go over to Adam's house afterward, but ended up going much earlier instead. Which wasn't really too bad, except that I felt like the only reason we didnt go to FF night was that J*** didn't go. As in, just going with me wasn't good enough. I'm really oversimplifying this. Mark said that wasn't the case, but whatever.

As his possible departure looms closure, I feel like I should be spending as much time as possible with him. So why was it that when he called me today to see if I wanted to go to a gymnastics meet, it was really just too much for me to get out of bed? I don't think I've EVER done that before. Well, I was really tired from last night. Showing up in a school girl outfit does wonders for Adam's broken rib, apparently. I'd like to do an entry about that actually, but I'm not in the mood right now.

A couple of things... One, I'd like to spend some time with just Mark and I. I do really like J***, but I don't want him to be there every single time we hang out. I can't say that I feel like the third wheel every time we hang out, but sometimes.

Also, I have actually made no effort to actually spend some one on one time with him. I guess I feel like that will be giving the beast a name.

Sigh.

Also, Michelle is doing her acting weird thing again. Everytime I call her it seems like I am annoying her. She's really really busy I know. But of course she seems to find time for you know who. I don't know if it's a fucking complex or what, I just always feel like I'm just not as important to people.

Adam brought me home earlier. I would have much preffered to stay there, but the offer was not extended. He said that his friend R*** was coming by to discuss a business thing they've been trying to work out.

I just don't want to be here. And I have tooo many things running through my head right now.

:|cause|:|effect|: